Emily Paster is a busy woman. This mom of two, wife and part-time law professor lives in Chicago and writes about work-life balance on her blog, West of the Loop. When Emily responded to my query for guest posts she proposed an interesting essay topic: the case against the family dinner with a recipe for her favorite veal stew. Fitting great food into family life, she says, is a challenge with two young children. One of her concessions in recent years has been to eat with her husband after they are asleep. I was interested and excited to hear her argument. I have to say, after reading her essay I do agree with her on many points. There are usually one or two nights a week when we put my daughter to bed before eating dinner ourselves. It’s like having date night in our own kitchen. What do you think about family dinner? How do you feel? Let us know, Emily and I would love to hear.

Shhh…do you want to hear a secret? Come a little closer. Okay, here goes: my family doesn’t eat dinner together and I couldn’t be happier about it.

Are you shocked? Do you think my children will grow up to be overweight glue-sniffing felons? I’m actually pretty confident that my children are going to turn out okay despite my flagrant disregard for the importance of family dinner. You see, my husband and I have given up family dinners in favor of two other considerations that we believe are equally important: early bedtimes and happily married parents.

My husband works long hours.  Most nights, he arrives home at 6:45 pm. That is simply too late for our children, ages seven and three, to wait to eat dinner and still get to bed at what we consider a decent hour. Instead, I feed the kids their dinner around 6 pm and then, when Daddy walks in at quarter to seven, they are ready to head upstairs for baths and the bedtime routine, a routine which is handled exclusively by my husband. That way, the kids get some dedicated time with Daddy every evening.

What’s Going on Today: Prepping for Halloween night, having a bbq with the neighbors!

Naptime Goals: Make Apple Spice Bundt Cake with Maple Glaze, buy beer.

Tonight’s Menu: Brats, Dip, Cake, Beer.

Parenting Lesson of the Day: Halloween is now an endurance holiday, it lasts almost as long as Christmas!

Halloween has proved to be a much longer holiday than I expected. When I was little it was one night of trick-or-treating. But sometime in the thirty year span between my childhood and my daughter’s, Halloween morphed into a much bigger deal. Over the course of the weekend we attended no fewer than four events all of which required costumes and receiving candy. Not to mention the Halloween themed meals, school parties and presents (!) that preceded the big day. I couldn’t believe how busy we were!

By the end of the weekend my Blue Tootsie Pop (her costume idea) was tuckered out. To make the actual day of Halloween fun and relaxed my neighbors and I decided to have a little bbq and restrict trick-or-treating to our local neighborhood only. We wanted to give it the family fun feeling, strolling the streets, chatting with neighbors, that we remembered from growing up.

Butternut Squash Puree for Harvest Dinner

Aimee Wimbush-Bourque is the editor of Simple Bites and the well-known blog Under the High Chair. She is also a culinary school graduate and busy mom of two. I never cease to be amazed at her fabulous inventive recipes and the techniques she employs to fit great food into her daily life. Today I invited her to share some stories about cooking with her kids and her recent harvest dinner. I loved hearing how she cooked her family meal over the course of several days and enjoyed it every step of the way. Note: For more of my interview with Aimee, and her amazing recipe for Butternut Squash Mac & Cheese, come over to Babble and take a look.

Naptime Chef: Your boys are no longer infants but when they were, what kind of cooking methods did you employ to get table on the table every night?

Aimee: Parents of young children will agree that kids like to be right where the action is when they’re trying to make dinner. That’s right, directly underfoot. Now that I have two children of my own, it seems they appear at my elbow as soon as I pull out my Kitchen Aid. Fortunately, I wouldn’t have it any other way!

As parents, we have a responsibility to make eating about more than just putting food in our mouths.  Take the time to make the gathering and preparing of food, as well as the crucial sitting down together around the dinner table, central to eating.

First things first, however, be sure to teach your children the importance of kitchen safety and set boundaries early.

I have a few tricks that I employ when I need to get dinner on the table. Since the little ones wanted to be where I am, I don’t fight it (impossible anyway!) and often set them up to play in the corner of the kitchen.

They have one cupboard and one drawer that they are free to rifle through and ‘cook’ with the contents. I also occasionally set up ‘rice play’ – think mini indoor sandbox, but with post-dated rice, a few toy machines, and plenty of measuring spoons & cups.

If I’m canning or doing something that requires my full attention, I keep them occupied at the table with art supplies or play dough, and keep the youngest strapped into a booster seat so I can decide when he gets down!

I’ve also discovered that popsicles are my friends. My incredibly active 2 year old sits in his high chair for a full twenty minutes and enjoys a homemade popsicle. That usually gives me enough time to prep supper in the afternoon, if for some reason, he’s decided to skip his nap.